You’ve seen the inflight movie. Angry Birds has been boring for months. And no, you don’t care if it’s peanuts or pretzels. Red-eye or not, sometimes you just want to spend your flight sleeping. However, it takes practice. It’s an art form, and one we’ve spent countless hours failing and then mastering. Find your style and test out each position. We just can’t help you if you drool on yourself.
The Window Lean
Dibs window. Don’t worry about losing easy bathroom access, you’ll be too deep in REM to notice. The set up? Put your pillow against the wall, it’s a luxury only privy to this seat, and one we suggest you take if you don’t want to land grumpy.
Heads Down, Seven Up
Pull out the tray table attached to the back of the seat in front of you, and tell your stewardess you won’t be needing a drink. Your tray is now a pillow, and it’s busy holding your head.
Cozy your head onto the shoulder of the person to either your right or left. Hope you’re the leaner and not the leaned-on. And really hope you know whoever’s next to you.
The Sit Up
This is called The Sit Up because you’re simply sitting up but also because it’s tough work. No problem, you’re straight G. Screw the blanket, screw the pillow, and screw the eye mask, you have your New Era for that. Tip the hat down, turn up your tunes, and start counting sheep. Whether your head lobs forward or to the side, you’ll wake up sore.
The Neck Pillow
Buy a u-shaped neck pillow. You won’t look sexy, but while they’re laughing, you’ll be snoozing. Sweet dreams, haters.
The faux-bed is the diamond of inflight sleeping, as it requires a full row of empty seats. This is a rare occasion, like a landing on time or no turbulence, but it happens, and when it does, take it! Request a blanket, grab a pillow, and sprawl your bad self all up over that row. If you find yourself in First Class on a newer plane though, check if they have a pod. If so, your bed might not be so faux after all.
This works best with an aisle seat, but is still possible without one, depending on your situation. Bring your legs to your hips, and kick them off to the side. Warning, if you are in an aisle “crabbing,” be conscious of the passing food and beverage cart and stumbling passengers.
Airplanes seats were made for this, so here’s your bread and butter. Press the circular button, push your seat back, and sink into the little depth you’ve now made for yourself. Just don’t recline before takeoff, or you risk that awful moment of being woken abruptly by a steward telling you to put your seat up.
Throw it up, throw it up, watch it all fall out, don’t throw up, don’t throw up, just ball up… This is a good way to stabilize your nausea. Cross your legs, tuck your arms in your chest, and plop your head towards your knees.
Because the most comfortable positions aren’t actually that comfortable.